So it is within, it shall be seen without

It is a shame that so many people are sleeping or dead within.   If someone’s heart and spirit are corrupt so are their acts, deeds, words and life.  Most ugliness comes from a place of pain.  When you are sleeping so deep that everything around you is pain one must look deeper to see why a person falls asleep and stays asleep.

Some people have terrible childhoods and they cannot extricate themselves from those events or that time.  Some learn the behavior from parents, elders and authority figures in their lives. Some are damaged as adults.  It is not to say that all who are harmed will cause harm or be damaged. But sadly, most will.

It is within our power to eradicate the damage and become light. The energy you project can be felt by others and sometimes it can transform them. Sadly not all are awake or want to be woke up. They instead choose to spew hatred anywhere they can and most often towards those that care about them the most.

If you want love, you must be loveable.  If you want peace you must create peace. If you want serenity you must insure your environment is serene.  It is not about the grand acts but the small ones.  When you cannot appreciate the small things others do for you they eventually burn out and can no longer keep being sucked by the negative vortex you create.  People will leave you and move on to a more positive and nurturing place.  In the end one must do what is right for them.

I am a healer. I always have been. I have always tended to the needs of others and often my needs go unmet.  When dealing with someone who is injured or emotionally damaged everyone can see it.  When that person cries out for love and understanding and help, I run blindly into the path of destruction thinking I can help.

The problem is that when a person is in an emotional coma and not capable of creating positive energy around them, healers get drained and instead of helping they take on the negative energy.  That negativity can fester until you just want as far away as possible. At some point the person wanting the change has to do the work and when they are not willing or able to see the impact their toxic nature causes people who care, they stop caring.

It is not out of malice but out of self preservation. It is painful for someone like me to hurt someone else. It goes against my nature.  Sometimes it is warranted when the person you are with is sucking the life energy out of you and breaking you down in order to control you.

Taking back that control has so much power it is like plugging in a nearly drained rechargeable battery! I am lit up again! I spent the best weekend I have had in YEARS!  Everywhere I go people smile at me, talk to me and feed me spiritually with their positive energy.

What you put out, you get back.  I smile again. There is serenity in my life. There is joy in my heart.  There is positive energy flowing through me again.  I am no longer caring for any emotional coma patients.

My particularly painful journey of the past dozen years has ended for good. I feel I have learned what I needed to learn and did what I needed to do so I could never again allow myself to be drained by an emotionally and mentally disturbed person who has no desire to ever wake up to the true beauty that life holds.

I smile and the world is smiling back at me.  What is within me is pure love, joy and a playful curiosity about life.  It would seem the last few weeks has shown me that what is within, is glowing without and others can see it and respond in the most loving and positive ways!

I am loving life!

 

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